Happy Reformation Day.

  [pause-button]
Tino, what happened?
    "I don't know."
Yes you do.  What did John Tetzel put his hand in?
   "Fire?"
It hurts!  Why?
   "To scare them."
For how long, not a day, not a week... but?
    "Forever."
That's right.  He's warning them of...
   "Hell."
What will save them?
   "God."
How?
   "The one who died, Jesus."
What does Tetzel say will help?
   "A paper."
What does he want from them?
   "Their money."
What's he giving them?
   "Nothing."
Is he a pastor?
   "No. Not really."
Who's he helping?
   "No one."
What should he be doing?
   "Giving them forgiveness in Jesus."
Right.
   "Happy Reformation Day."
  [un-pause button]
           (Tino tosses dad another Red-Vine.)

Despicable Me", a movie review for kids by a kid.

A bad man named Gru had plans to steal  the moon .  Then ended  up loving 3 orphan girls who stole his heart.

I really liked it, so I rate it 4 stars out of 5.

Pasted from a notepad that Dad typed in, without looking, staring Tino right in the eyes the whole time:
------------------
Tino is my super cool boy, that I love very very very much!!!  Right?  Y'know it.  Don't you?

Who else is the best boy ever?

Well you know who is the best girl ever?  Right?  That's ... you?  No.  That's Evie!  Rgith?  Or wrong?  Good.

Well duh!  Der ner ner.
-------------------
Afterwards, while running fast:
"Mom!!!  Dad is a genius, why ...he can type without looking!"

Birthday Hug

Hey Tino, can I have a birthday hug?

"Oh yeah."

That's nice.

"Thanks, Dad, I really needed that."

(Old one from 2010)

Driving Dad

"Good night, Tino.  We're driving Daddy someplace early tomorrow."

Yeah, Tino you'll be driving.

"But I'm not even 16 yet!"

"It's not just how old you are."

"Yeah, I'm not tall enough..."

Knock Knock. Chicken apple who?

"Knock knock."

Who's there?

"Chicken apple."

Chicken apple who?

"Do-a-diddle."

No no, say something funny there.

"Oh i forgot."

...

"Knock knock."

Chicken apple who?

"No, dad, don't copy me."

Don't copy you?

"Yes."

...

"Knock knock."

...

"Knock knock."

...

"Say who's there?"

...

"Say who's there."

Say who's there.

"No, dad, don't copy me."

Don't copy you?

"Yes."

...

"Oh, I mean, no, don't copy me."

...

"Are you kidding around?"

...

"Put that on my blog."